Song Samples
Full Song List
1. "Name That Internal Organ!"
2. "Disposal Engineers"
3. "30 Feet of Beauty"
4. "Sugar, Sugar"
5. "We've Got the Guts"
6. "They Won"
7. "I'd Like to Thank"
8. "It Takes Our Breath Away"
9. "Name That Internal Organ!" (Reprise)
Casting
Flexible casting from 11-40 students.
Use as many Stomachs, Livers, etc. as desired.
One student can easily play several roles if needed. Note that all roles
can be played by either boys or girls; see our comments on page 31
of the Teacher's Guide.
Script
This is the first one-third of the script:
CHARACTERS:
Announcers (3)
Brain
Kidneys (2)
Stomach
Mouth
Esophagus
Cells (2)
Duodenum
Jejunum
Ileum
Liver
Pancreas
Gallbladder
Appendix
Heart
Raging Hormone
Lungs (2)
and a CHORUS composed of all students who are not playing roles on stage
at the time.
(A large banner across the back of the stage reads: "Internal Organ
Hall of Fame."
Or perhaps a backdrop portrays the front of an impressive building with "Internal
Organ Hall of Fame" written above. The CLASS (INTERNAL ORGANS) is
spread
across the stage in a semi-circle facing the audience.
THREE ANNOUNCERS step forward holding microphones. ANNOUNCERS
address audience as if on camera.)
ANNOUNCER #1: Good afternoon [evening], ladies and gentlemen. We're
here
in front of the world-famous Internal Organ Hall of Fame.
ANNOUNCER #2 (looking at CLASS): Wow! Look at all these internal organs.
ANNOUNCER #3: Each one of them is hoping that this will be the year
it is
inducted into the Hall of Fame.
ANNOUNCER #1: (Points to LIVER) Is that the Liver over there? (LIVER
waves)
ANNOUNCER #3 (also pointing): And there's the Gall Bladder. (GALL BLADDER
gives the "thumbs up")
ANNOUNCER #2 (looking): Has he grown a mustache?
ANNOUNCER #1: No, that's just a bile duct. The rules expressly forbid
organs
from growing any facial hair. Now let's get this ceremony going. (to
Organs)
Are you ready?
CLASS (very loudly and together): We're ready!
ANNOUNCER #2: It's a big day for organs everywhere!
Song 1 -
Listen now!
CLASS:
No wonder we're excited
We're hoping we're invited
To the Internal Organ Hall of Fame
Each year we're all inspected
But just a few elected
To the Internal Organ Hall of Fame.
Internal, Internal, Internal Organ Hall of Fame.
We've waited and we've waited
To find out if we've made it
To the Internal Organ Hall of Fame
The judges now are saying
Which ones they'll be displaying
In the Internal Organ Hall of Fame.
Internal, Internal, Internal Organ Hall of Fame.
(The following 3 sections are rapped by different pairs of actors.
There is a
pause between sections so different pairs can step forward.)
Hey there's a spleen
Look there he goes
I don''t even know
Why he bothered to show.
What I mean to say
Is if the spleen today
Goes ahead and wins
I'll be blown away.
'Cause the heart it beats for us
The lungs they breathe for us
But...I don't even know what the spleen does.
ENTIRE CLASS:
Right here within these portals
We honor the immortals
In the Internal Organ Hall of Fame
So come to our production
It's time for the induction
To the Internal Organ Hall of Fame
Internal, Internal, Internal Organ Hall of Fame
Internal, internal, Internal Organ Hall of Fame.
(ANNOUNCERS step forward)
ANNOUNCER #1: We've been told that this year there will be three new
organs
chosen for the Hall of Fame.
ANNOUNCER #2: I've got my money on the Spleen.
ANNOUNCER #3: Which reminds me, ladies and gentlemen. This is an important
but friendly competition among distinguished internal organs: please,
no wagering.
ANNOUNCER #1 (pointing): Here comes the Brain to announce the first
inductee!
BRAIN (enters holding an envelope, addresses audience): Hello. I'm the
Brain.
On behalf of the Nervous System, I'm honored to announce this year's
first winner.
Oh, and be sure to visit the new exhibit in the Hall of Fame, entitled "Naughty
Neurons:
When Good Cells Go Bad" Now, for the award. (opens envelope) The
Hall of Fame is
delighted to invite these twin organs within its walls. Please join me
in congratulating...
the Kidneys!
(CLASS applauds. KIDNEYS enter, happy)
KIDNEY #1: This is so wonderful.
KIDNEY #2: All that work on our image really paid off.
ANNOUNCER #1: Excuse me. You worked on your image?
KIDNEY #1: Are you kidding? Do you know what we do all day?
ANNOUNCER #2: Sudoku?
KIDNEY #2: We filter out the blood.
ANNOUNCER #3: How do you do that?
KIDNEY #1: We collect wastes carried by the blood from the cells and
then send
them to the bladder.
KIDNEY #2 (looking into the crowd of organs, signals): Yo, Bladder!
Lookin' good!
KIDNEY #1: We also control the amount of water and salts in the body.
KIDNEY #2: But folks just remember the stuff about urination.
ANNOUNCER #2 (disgusted): Ooh! Ick! Yuck!
(pause, then to KIDNEY #2)
Sorry, nothing personal.
KIDNEY #2: See, that's what we mean.
KIDNEY #1: We needed some image management if we were ever going to
make
it into the Hall of Fame.
Song 2 -
Listen now!
KIDNEYS:
People found it scary
When they heard "urinary"
We would never make it to the top.
So we knew to win it
We'd really have to spin it
Get a little magic PR pop!
Disposal Engineers
That is our new name
Disposal Engineers
We kidneys have no shame.
Disposal Engineers
Disposal Engineers
Disposal Engineers
We're in the Hall of Fame.
Don't say "urination"
We're now about "filtration"
Cleaning up the toxins in the blood
That's "waste elimination"
We're masters of "hydration"
All those fancy words are clear as mud.
KIDNEYS and CHORUS:
Disposal Engineers
That is our new name
Disposal Engineers
We kidneys have no shame
Disposal Engineers
Disposal Engineers
Disposal Engineers
We're in the Hall of Fame.
(KIDNEYS exit. The STOMACH, MOUTH, ESOPHAGUS enter.)
ESOPHAGUS: Hi. I'm the Esophagus. I'm that muscular tube that carries
food from
the mouth to the stomach.
STOMACH: And I'm the Stomach. I'm a very elastic organ where food is
stored
until I produce some powerful gastric juices to start digestion.
MOUTH: And I'm the mouth.
ESOPHAGUS (looks at MOUTH expectantly): Go on.
MOUTH: Huh?
STOMACH: Tell the nice folks here something about yourself.
MOUTH: Oh. Well, my favorite color is lemon yellow.
ESOPHAGUS: No. I mean about what you do.
MOUTH: I drool a lot.
STOMACH: Well, saliva is important. YOU are very important.
MOUTH: I am?
ESOPHAGUS: Sure. You're the entrance to the digestive system.
MOUTH: You're joking.
STOMACH: No. Really. You're the gateway to the gastrointestinal tract.
MOUTH: You're pulling my tongue.
ESOPHAGUS: Where do you think all that food goes that you chew up?
MOUTH: I don't know---Pittsburgh?
STOMACH: No! It heads right on down the alimentary canal.
MOUTH: Like in Venice?
ESOPHAGUS: The alimentary canal is a 30-foot tube in the body for digesting
food.
MOUTH: 30 feet? I never realized I had so much back-up.
STOMACH: Rumor has it that one member of the digestive system will be
chosen
today for the Hall of Fame. It could be one of us!
Song 3 -
Listen now!
STOMACH, MOUTH, ESOPHAGUS:
30 feet of beauty
Come and see
Each organ is a cutie
Just like me.
No wonder we are snooty
We're the best
30 feet of beauty
Let's digest!
Na na na na na
Na na na na na
Na na na na.
30 feet of beauty
Don't be scared
Send food down the chutee
We're prepared.
We all do our duty
We don't frown
30 feet of beauty
Going down!
Start with the mouth
Then head down south to the esophagus
The stomach's not far
Kind of a star to quite a lot of us.
Small intestine
Large intestine
The colon is so cool
We learned it all in alimentary school.
Alimentary, alimentary, alimentary school.
ALL THREE and CHORUS:
30 feet of beauty
Come and see
Each organ is a cutie
Just like me.
No wonder we are snooty
We're the best
30 feet of beauty
Let's digest!
Na na na na na
Na na na na na
Na na na na.
Start with the mouth
Then head down south to the esophagus
The stomach's not far
Kind of a star to quite a lot of us.
Small intestine
Large intestine
The colon is so cool
We learned it all in alimentary school.
Alimentary, alimentary, alimentary school.
Alimentary, alimentary, alimentary school.
(STOMACH, MOUTH, and ESOPHAGUS exit. ANNOUNCERS enter.)
ANNOUNCER #1: Now it's time for our second induction.
ANNOUNCER #2: I'm still rooting for the Spleen.
ANNOUNCER #3: You're not supposed to take sides.
ANNOUNCER #2: What do you have against lymphatic organs?
ANNOUNCER #3: I don't have ANYTHING against them.
ANNOUNCER #2: Oh no? Then where are your tonsils?
ANNOUNCER #3: My tonsils? They were taken out when I was five.
ANNOUNCER #2: Ah HAH!
ANNOUNCER #3: What do you mean by that? They were inflamed.
ANNOUNCER #2: Tonsil killer.
ANNOUNCER #1: Pay attention! It's time to announce the winning organ.
ANNOUNCER #2: Fine. (short pause, then quickly) I hope it's the Spleen.
(A CELL makes a loud entrance, helping a second CELL who can barely
walk)
CELL #2 (the weak one, moans): Glucose. Gloooooocose.
CELL #1: Excuse us. Can we have a little breathing room here?
ANNOUNCER #1: What's going on?
CELL #1: We're Cells.
ANNOUNCER #3: Cells? What are you doing here? This ceremony is for Organs.
CELL #1: What do you think organs are made of? Tissues, that's what.
And tissues
are made of us. Cells. My buddy here ran out of fuel in all the excitement.
CELL #2 (desperate): I need some glucose. Quick.
CELL #1: We break down sugar into carbon dioxide and water‹it's
how we
obtain energy. It's called respiration.
CELL #2 (moans): Sugar. Shooooooogar.
CELL #1 (to ANNOUNCERS): Well don't just stand there---go get us
a glucose molecule!
(ANNOUNCERS race off)
Song 4 -
Listen now!
CELLS:
Sugar, sugar
I need some
My nucleus is feeling numb.
Sugar, sugar
No delay I think I'm losing DNA.
Sugar, sugar
Don't be cruel
I break it down to use as fuel
Sugar, sugar
Don't be hard
I'm feelin' faint I need some carbs!
Ooooh I got a spasm
In my cytoplasm
My metabolism quit
I have got a glucose deficit---I'm gonna split!
Sugar, sugar
Please don't hide
I need that monosaccharide
Sugar, sugar
I am parched
Don't give me water I need starch!
Sugar, sugar
I need some
My nucleus is feeling numb.
Sugar, sugar
No delay
I think I'm losing DNA.
CELLS and CHORUS:
Ooooh I got a spasm
In my cytoplasm
My metabolism quit
I have got a glucose deficit---I'm gonna split!
Sugar, sugar
Don't be cruel
I break it down to use as fuel
Sugar, sugar
Don't be hard
I'm feelin' faint I need some carbs!
(CELLS hobble off. The BRAIN enters, holding envelope.)
(This concludes the first one-third of the script.)
Additional Comments and Reviews:
"It was a raving success. Kids still sing the songs to us and wear
the T-shirts. We know they learned a lot---we certainly did! I think your
lyrics border on genius. They are cute and clever enough to be easy to
remember, yet are actually quite in-depth in their coverage of the topics.
No one will ever forget what a hormone does. Thanks for filling a vital
role in education."
---Carolyn Lawrence, Teacher (4th/5th/6th grades), Charles Hoffman Elementary,
Running Springs, CA
"Our 5th grade performed Name That Internal Organ on Thursday, and it was soooooooooooooooooooooooo much fun! What a terrific learning experience for all involved! Everyone loved loved loved the show - especially our principal, who was loudly cracking up the entire show.....the songs, humor, lines, it was all just perfect! I am now a Bad Wolf devotee!!!!"
---Annie Mergott, Show Director (5th grade), Thomas B. Conley School, Asbury, NJ
"It's freakin' hilarious. My favorite of the ten plays of yours
that I've done.
A resounding success!"
---Steven Oberlander, Teacher (5th grade), Neal Dow Elementary, Chico, CA
"What a blast! We developed three Raging Hormone parts and an Eyeball
as extras.
They learned a ton and enjoyed all of the jokes and music. We also added
a
spleen---Go Spleen!!"
---Catina Haugen, Teacher (6th grade), Grant Elementary, Petaluma, CA
"I just put on Name That Internal Organ with my third graders,
and it was a huge hit!
My principal said it was the best elementary play he's seen, and the
kids and parents
were happy too! This was my very first solo production... I'm happy to
report that
even I could pull it off. Thanks again!"
---Becky Baker, Teacher (3rd grade), Ferry Elementary, Grand Haven, MI
"Two classes have sung their way through the 5th grade state standardized
science
test. Plus the audience laughed all the way though it!"
---Kim Yeager, Teacher (4th and 5th grades), California Montessori Project, Shingle
Springs, CA
Frequently Asked Questions About Bad Wolf Products and Licensing
How does your pricing and licensing work?
A: In short: each teacher/director using the play should have a copy of it. That's it! Your purchase gives you the right to use the play with as many classes as you wish, to photocopy the script for your actors, and to put on as many performances as you wish. This one-time purchase gives you a lifetime license. See below for more information on site licenses (for 3+ teachers or whole schools).
Q: What comes in the package?
A: Every musical play comes with the script and a 12-page Teacher's Guide that provides lots of tips and advice for using the play from start to finish. It also includes the audio recording for the play, which has all the songs both WITH and WITHOUT vocals. Sheet music is NOT included with the basic package, but it is available for $12. Extra/replacement CDs are also available for $12.
Every non-musical play comes with the script and the 12-page Teacher's Guide.
Q: I'm just one teacher putting on a play. If I use the play with multiple classes, do I have to purchase multiple licenses?
A: No! Your purchase gives you a lifetime license to be used with as many actors and classes as you wish. If other teachers/directors wish to use the play as well, they will need to purchase their own licenses.
Q: Do I need to purchase scripts for students?
A: No! Your purchase includes permission to photocopy the script for your actors.
Q: What is a "site license"? How do I know if I need one?
A site license is the economical choice when a whole school or grade level wants to put on the same play. Instead of each teacher/director having to purchase a script, the school/site can purchase
a site license. This comes with three copies of the play (or one digital download) and permission to make copies for any additional participating teachers, as well as all the actors. You do NOT need to purchase both a site license and individual copies of the play; just buy one or the other.
Q: I understand that I can get two or more scripts for $35 each. Do they have to be the same play?
Nope! The discount applies whether you are purchasing multiple copies of the same show or single copies of multiple shows.
Q: What is the difference between the printed and digital versions? Which one should I get?
There is no difference in terms of content. The printed version of a musical play comes with an audio CD in a plastic sleeve in the back of the book. The digital version comes with two downloadable files: the script (PDF format) and the songs (individual MP3 files compressed in ZIP format). The advantage of the digital version is that you will not pay shipping and you can start using it instantly. Please read the question following this one about the technical requirements for digital files.
Non-musical plays are available in the form of a printed book or a PDF file.
Q: What are the technical requirements for the digital version?
- You will need to have Adobe Reader (free) or another software application that can open PDF files.
- You will need to be able to open ZIP files. The vast majority of computers should be able to do this without difficulty. If you wish to download the music directly to your phone or tablet, you will need to download an app that will open ZIP files. Many free ones are available.
- You will need to have some kind of audio player (such as iTunes or Windows Media Player) that will play MP3 files.
Advanced technical knowledge is not required; but please note that we do not have the ability to offer technical support for issues related to digital files. If you are unsure, it is probably best to stick with the printed version.
Q: What is your return/exchange policy?
A: Bad Wolf proudly offers a 100% guarantee. You can always exchange a product for another or get a full refund. No time limits, no questions.
Q: Is it OK if I edit the script?
A: Yes! Consider the play to be a jumping-off point. You are always welcome to change or omit anything that doesn't work for your class, administration, or parents. You are welcome to rewrite
lyrics, lines, or jokes -- or add your own! (The kids love doing this, by the way.)
Q: How long does shipping take?
A: We say that you should allow for one week within the U.S., but most orders are shipped the same day and arrive 1-3 days later. International orders usually take around two weeks to arrive.
Q: Do I need to pay any performance royalties?
A: As long as your admission price is less than $5 per ticket, you never need to pay performance royalties with a Bad Wolf show. If you decide to charge more than $5 a ticket, or if you are using one of our plays for a PAID workshop, camp, assembly, etc., pay only a low 1-2% royalty on gross revenues. See our royalty page to view the rates and pay.